Unique Visitors

Flag Counter

Friday 20 January 2017

COMPATIBILITY IS INDISPENSABLE TO MARRIAGE

Greetings friends! I will like to continue from where we left off last time when I tried to canvas the idea that courtship is not indispensable to marriage. In other words while I personally encourage courtship but there is nowhere in the scriptures that says courtship is necessary before marriage.

The second idea I would like us to consider is the idea of compatibility. I am sure in one or two or my previous write ups I may have touched upon this subject but today let us examine the idea further.

The notion many of us grew up with as teenagers and young people is the the person you ought to marry MUST be compatible with you. The issue of compatibility as far as my own experience is concerned was that the person has to like the things I like and possess similar tastes for fashion, food and what have you. So growing up we referred to the compatibility profile given to us by horoscope to influence our choices.

Many years down after, I make bold to say that the idea of compatibility  before marriage falls flat on its back for the following reasons:-

1. People especially men change their taste over time based on age and financial status. For example a young man just starting life may not care too much about wearing very expensive perfumes or eat in the choicest restaurants for obvious reasons - he cannot afford it simple.

2. The fact that people like the same things does not mean they are compatible. The fans of both Manchester United and Manchester City both like the game of football but they hardly see eye to eye.

3. Compatibility is a process not a destination - a means to an end. You work at it over time. My wife never used to like a particular type of African Dish which I cherish; over time she started to enjoy the meal and even cherishes it now.

My Father in the Lord Dr. James Ovbiose James once gave us a classic example of compatibility. He is from a typical Nigeria Village married to our Mother in the Lord who is from a well to do home and grew up in Lagos. So because of his background, he likes his morning pap tick and of course without sugar or milk (which we virtually unheard of in the village) but mummy likes her pap watery and embellished with sugar and milk. So when they got married they solved this seemingly inconsequential problem by mummy preparing the pap very tick, serves daddy's own first and thereafter adds water, sugar and milk to taste. This may look simplistic but I know couples who have quarreled over flimsier issues.

The point being made is that compatibility is what you are your spouse work it out to be. You can always get your spouse to like the things you like if your motives are genuine.

More next time.

Femiimevbore@gmail.com
www.facebook.com/officialecc?ref=hl
www.lifebuilder.ecwid.com
 

www.elshaddaicovenantchurch.org 


No comments:

Post a Comment