MONEY MANAGEMENT AND THE HOME

It was my father in the Lord, Dr. James Iruobe that said in his book "Four Things Intending Couples Must Agree On Before Marriage" that money is always the first issue that causes quarrels in many homes. After 24 years of marriage I cannot agree less.

While many believe that it is the absence of money that causes trouble in the home, may I suggest to you that the presence of surplus money can also pose a problem if the couples do not have any idea about financial intelligence.

Money comes to everybody but how one manages what comes in is what makes the difference between financial freedom and slavery.

We have for many centuries been influenced by Greek thinking is the idea that we make money primarily for spending. The "Money to Burn" mentality that still drives many a culture even today. The idea is that as long as money keeps flowing, there can be no end as to what pleasures we can pursue.

Every family must form an ideology about money. How do you and your spouse see money? Do you see money as a servant of as a boss? If it happens that you suddenly lose your source of income (though I pray I may never happen to you) will you spouse still be that loving husband or wife?

The principles my mentor has over his 30 something years in ministry taught are very relevant if we are to find financial freedom as a couple. I will like to outline some of them here not necessarily in any particular order of importance.

PRINCIPLE 1 - Whatever is earned belongs to the family:
This is to me the starting point for ensuring that the family becomes financially free. Every couple ought to sit down and agree that whatever comes in either through the man or the woman belongs to the family. I know that in our culture this may be a contentious issue but the idea here is more of openness and transparency rather than outright ownership. Let me clarify what I am trying to pass across.

If a man or woman earns salary, the money should be declared as family income. This enables the couple to pull resources together and plan both for themselves and their children. When there are secrets there is bound to be misconceptions. For example, if a woman does not know how much her husband earns the tendency is that she may make demands beyond the capacity of her husband to provide.

I have always advocated that it is much less "harmful" for your wife to know your level of income as well as its source than to keep her in the dark about your finances. I know many widows who have no idea about their late husband's estate and all that the man labored for has passed on to third parties.

Telling your wife what you earn also help the family to budget appropriately and avoid living above your means.

More next time

God bless

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