UNDERSTANDING THE MARRIAGE COVENANT 4 - CONVICTION SUPERIOR TO EMOTION

"So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said,

"This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man."

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed." Gen 2:21-25 (NASB)

When God created the woman from the rib taken out of the man, the reaction of the man to this event has profound lessons for the marriage institution.

The first lesson to learn is that God is the unseen hand at work in any marriage that will be blissful. When we remove God from the equation, then the whole fabric of marriage no matter how exciting it may be is bound to come crashing down with time.

The second thing is that God created woman because the man had a need. The woman was not created essentially for herself but because she came to fill a void in the man’s life. If we understand this it will help us find our place and play our God given role in the home. 

The third thing to see very clearly is that the first reaction of Adam was not one of emotion but of conviction. He said “she is now the bone of my bones and the flesh of my flesh”. This is the statement of one who was operating beyond emotions.

Emotion gives you a fluffy heart and goose pimples but when all that dissipates you are faced with reality and it takes conviction to stick to your spouse. The emotions of love takes you into cloud nine beyond reason and reality.

Adam was convinced that Eve was now part and parcel of his being therefore it was easy for him to remained “glued” to her in spite of the fact that she was responsible for him falling out of favor with God and losing his place in the Garden of Eden.

It is conviction that makes a man maintain a course of action. It is conviction that fuels passion and gives a man the reason for going on in spite of obstacles and odds.

When you are convinced like Adam was that your partner is God’s gift to enrich your life and file the natural void which is present in every man then you are taking the right step in sustaining your relationship.

Remember, conviction is superior to emotion.

Femi Imevbore
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www.elshaddaicovenantchurch.org

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UNDERSTANDING THE MARRIAGE COVENANT 3 - WHAT JESUS SAID

“And some of the Pharisees came up, and in order to test Him and try to find a weakness in Him asked, Is it lawful for a man to dismiss and repudiate and divorce his wife. He answered them, What did Moses command you? They replied, Moses allowed a man to write a bill of divorce and put her away. But Jesus said to them, Because of the hardness of heart (your condition of insensibility to the call of  God) he wrote you this precept in your law. But from the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave (behind) his father and his mother and be joined to his wife and cleave closely to her permanently. And the two shall become one flesh, so that they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has united (joined together) let not man separate or divide. And indoors the disciples questioned Him again about this subject. And he said to them, Whoever dismisses (repudiates and divorces) his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman dismisses (repudiates and divorces) her husband and marries another, she commits adultery." Mark 10:2- 12. (Amplified)

If you are a Christian or even a non Christian, I am sure you would want to take the words of Jesus seriously concerning the issue of marriage and divorce. This is so much more important because we live in an age where there is so much confusion about what life really means.

Nowadays it is common to hear an unborn child called the “product of conception” as if unborn babies are “commodities” to have and discard as one pleases. The confusion that abounds in the definition of what marriage is has reached alarming proportions with governments of western nations putting pressure on some other nations to implement gay rights with the attendant result that "same sex marriage” is been approved by law. How depraved the world is slowly becoming that very soon it may become approved by law for humans to marry animals.

Let for a moment reflect on one of the reasons why God destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah in Genesis 19. Earlier in Genesis 18:20 God told Abraham that the sin of Sodom and Gomorrah was “great” and “grievous”. Notice the two adjectives used to describe the gross sexual perversion that had come to epitomize these wicked cities. If God did not spare Sodom and Gomorrah who say we will get away with the total neglect and brazen audacity with which mankind is perverting the way of God?

Be that as it may, let us examine closely what Jesus had to say about the issue at hand. There are at least 5 issues that Jesus tackled when the Pharisees brought up this matter.

First is that marriage is between male and female. No matter how we try to justify our preferences, God ordained marriage to be between a man and a woman. This totally excludes same sex marriage! These are not my words but what Jesus said.

Secondly, marriage involves "a leaving” and a “cleaving”. The man leaves behind his father and mother, connoting the fact that he must reorder his priority in terms of his relationships and place his marriage above any other relationship he can be involved in. This is a challenge for men who put their families, careers or even their children before their spouses. Doing this negates God’s order says Jesus.

Thirdly, both the man and woman become one flesh – inseparable, indivisible. Divorce or separation or having a living in “partner” is outside God’s tenets. 

Fourthly, Jesus said unequivocally that divorce and separation is the outworking of the “hardiness of the heart”. In order words, to be divorced or separated from your marriage partner while still living is an exception to the rule. Unfortunately, man in the hardiness of his heart is trying to supplant God's order and uproot the very foundation upon which God says societies should be built.

Finally, Jesus addresses the issue of remarriage and shows that to marry a divorcee while the person’s partner is still alive amounts to adultery. 

What is important for us to take special note of is that once we enter the marriage union we are expected to be committed for life. The Priest will always say “for better for worse, for richer for poorer”. No more no less!

More on this next time!

Femi Imevbore
+2348080929292
femiimevbore@gmail.com
www.facebook.com/officialecc?ref=hl
www.lifebuilder.ecwid.com

www.elshaddaicovenantchurch.org

 Click HERE to listen to this wonderful message By Dr. James Iruobe

UNDERSTANDING THE MARRIAGE COVENANT 2

Last time we examined the definitions of covenant and contract under the broad topic "Understanding the Marriage Covenant".

Today, we continue by looking at the major differences between a covenant and a contract from the perspective of marriage?

1.      In a covenant, the parties are not equal in terms of obligations and responsibilities whereas in a contract, the parties have equal obligations and responsibilities.

2.      In a covenant, the stronger party is the one who initiates the agreement and makes a proposal to the other party.

3.      In a covenant, the one who makes the proposal cannot repudiate his obligations and responsibilities and the other party once the proposal is accepted is bound by the terms of the agreement irrespective of whether there is a breach or not. In order words, the terms and conditions of the covenant remains binding to both parties even if they breach the agreement.

4.      In a covenant there is no ouster clause and no tenure. Every covenant is supposed to be for life!

There is the story of man who married a beautiful woman and later found out that the woman had been unfaithful to him. It got so bad that the woman left him for another man. This man refused to remarry in spite of all the advice of friends and family. Unfortunate the woman was later diagnosed to have a terminal case of cancer and the man was by her side all through the ordeal.

A friend of his who could not understand this asked him how he could be so committed to a woman who had not only been unfaithful but treated him so badly? He told his friend never to show disrespect to his wife in his presence because she was HIS WIFE. The man understood what marriage was all about – a covenant.

It is this understanding that is lacking in our society today. People enter into marriage because they see others marrying or because they want to satisfy their sexual desires and in some cases because they want someone to cook for them and take care of the house among several other reasons too numerous to mention here. 

Marriage is not for babies or the immature; it is for people who are willing to make a lifelong commitment. It has always been intriguing to me that men can commit long time to a job or career but at the slightest sign of a challenge, are ready to opt out of a marriage.

Next time we shall examine what exactly Jesus said about marriage and its implications for all mankind.

Have a nice day!

Femi Imevbore
+2348080929292
femiimevbore@gmail.com
www.facebook.com/officialecc?ref=hl
www.lifebuilder.ecwid.com

www.elshaddaicovenantchurch.org

CLICK HERE to listen to this wonderful message by Dr. James Iruobe

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO A GREAT MAN OF GOD

Today my spiritual father and mentor Dr. James Iruobe turns another year. My sincere prayer for you sir is for greater grace and favour. The glory of God will enfold and enrich your ministry. You will be counted amongst the nobles and your life will affect this generation to the glory of God. Congratulations daddy.

Femi Imevbore
+2348080929292
femiimevbore@gmail.com
www.facebook.com/officialecc?ref=hl
www.lifebuilder.ecwid.com

www.elshaddaicovenantchurch.org

UNDERSTANDING THE MARRIAGE COVENANT

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” Genesis 2:24 (NIV)

“And some of the Pharisees came up, and in order to test Him and try to find a weakness in Him asked, Is it lawful for a man to dismiss and repudiate and divorce his wife. He answered them, What did Moses command you? They replied, Moses allowed a man to write a bill of divorce and put her away. But Jesus said to them, Because of the hardness of heart (your condition of insensibility to the call of  God) he wrote you this precept in your law. But from the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave (behind) his father and his mother and be joined to his wife and cleave closely to her permanently. And the two shall become one flesh, so that they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has united (joined together) let not man separate or divide. And indoors the disciples questioned Him again about this subject. And he said to them, Whoever dismisses (repudiates and divorces) his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman dismisses (repudiates and divorces) her husband and marries another, she commits adultery." Mark 10:2- 12. (Amplified)

It was the late Dr. Miles Monroe who said “When purpose is unknown, abuse is inevitable;" this to my mind is really the greatest problem of marriages. In this age of pluralism, things that were hitherto defined in a particular way have now been redefined to mean things that sometimes completely contradicts the original meaning.

The first thing to say about marriage is that many have come to see marriage as a CONTRACT rather than a COVENANT. It is important to make this distinction because this is the very foundation upon which the marriage union is built.
Can I say it loud and clear “Marriage is a COVENANT not a CONTRACT”.

What is a contract?
In very simple layman’s terms, a contract is an agreement between two or more parties stating in clear terms the obligations and responsibilities each parties will discharge in maintaining the agreement. If one party breaches the terms of the agreement, the other party is automatically absolved from any further obligations and responsibilities towards the agreement and such a party is free to exist that relationship. Furthermore in an agreement there is usually a tenure, a specific time frame under which the agreement is in effect after which the parties may or may not continue the relationship.

What is a covenant?
In contrast, a covenant is an agreement between one party (the stronger of the two parties)who proposes the terms of the agreement to another party (the weaker of the two) who accepts of rejects the offer. In the case of a covenant, the one who proposes the terms of the agreement cannot repudiate his obligations or responsibilities irrespective of what the other party does once the offer is accepted. In other words once a covenant is signed and sealed, there is no exit clause. It becomes an agreement for life.

Applying this to marriages, it is usually the man who is the stronger of the two that proposes to a woman and the woman is at liberty to either accept or reject the proposal. However, from God’s perspective once the proposal is made and accepted it becomes a covenant which can never be annulled or repudiated. The introduction of prenuptial contracts, divorce and multiple marriages or what David Pawson calls "Consecutive Polygamy" totally negates God's original design for marriage.

That is why before any man contemplates marriage it is advisable that he must have given serious thought to what he intends to go into because the purpose of marriage is a union for life.
To be continued!

Click here to listen to Understanding the Marriage Covenant by Dr. James Iruobe