7 TESTS OF OF LOVE

“For God commended his love towards us in that while we were yet sinners Jesus died for the ungodly”

1.   Is your love for your spouse based on feelings?   Yes    No

2.     Is your love for your spouse based on romance? Yes    No

3.     Does your spouse need to deserve your love for it to continue? Yes    No

4      Is your love for your spouse based on sex or physical intimacy? Yes    No

5      Is your love for your spouse based on the pleasure he or she gives you? Yes    No

6      If your spouse stops loving you today, will you also stop loving him or her? Yes    No

7       In one word describe what comes into your mind when you think of your spouse!

    Based on the six questions, for every yes score 10 and for every no score 5. If your total score is more than 30, then it is very likely that your relationship is based on infatuation and not true love. Any relationship based  on infatuation will encounter many hiccups.

The purpose of this test is primarily to show us where we stand in the scale of assessing if what we have for our spouse is true love from God’s perspective. The good news is that no matter what you score or where you stand you can change and begin to genuinely love your spouse because true love is a function of the will.

God chose to love us in spite of the fact that we do not deserve his love nor have we done anything to earn it. In fact we are totally unqualified to be loved by the omnipotent God. The second truth is that this love of God is both irreversible and unending. 

In the Bible whenever Israel did what was displeasing to God He dealt with them but His love never for one day abated. It is interesting to me that whenever God used another nation to chastise his people, He always ended up judging that nation.

True love is by choice; it is a commitment and it is continuous! Anything outside this cannot be true love; it could be infatuation, lust or romance but not true love.

If couples decide to base their love on the word of God and follow the principles set therein, their love for each other will never dissipate and breaking up will be completely non-existent.

Be blessed.

Femiimevbore@gmail.com
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www.elshaddaicovenantchurch.org 

UNDERSTANDING THE MARRIAGE COVENANT 2

Last time we examined the definitions of covenant and contract under the broad topic "Understanding the Marriage Covenant".

Today, we continue by looking at the major differences between a covenant and a contract from the perspective of marriage?

1.      In a covenant, the parties are not equal in terms of obligations and responsibilities whereas in a contract, the parties have equal obligations and responsibilities.

2.      In a covenant, the stronger party is the one who initiates the agreement and makes a proposal to the other party.

3.      In a covenant, the one who makes the proposal cannot repudiate his obligations and responsibilities and the other party once the proposal is accepted is bound by the terms of the agreement irrespective of whether there is a breach or not. In order words, the terms and conditions of the covenant remains binding to both parties even if they breach the agreement.

4.      In a covenant there is no ouster clause and no tenure. Every covenant is supposed to be for life!

There is the story of man who married a beautiful woman and later found out that the woman had been unfaithful to him. It got so bad that the woman left him for another man. This man refused to remarry in spite of all the advice of friends and family. Unfortunate the woman was later diagnosed to have a terminal case of cancer and the man was by her side all through the ordeal.

A friend of his who could not understand this asked him how he could be so committed to a woman who had not only been unfaithful but treated him so badly? He told his friend never to show disrespect to his wife in his presence because she was HIS WIFE. The man understood what marriage was all about – a covenant.

It is this understanding that is lacking in our society today. People enter into marriage because they see others marrying or because they want to satisfy their sexual desires and in some cases because they want someone to cook for them and take care of the house among several other reasons too numerous to mention here. 

Marriage is not for babies or the immature; it is for people who are willing to make a lifelong commitment. It has always been intriguing to me that men can commit long time to a job or career but at the slightest sign of a challenge, are ready to opt out of a marriage.

Next time we shall examine what exactly Jesus said about marriage and its implications for all mankind.

Have a nice day!

Femi Imevbore
+2348080929292
femiimevbore@gmail.com
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www.lifebuilder.ecwid.com

www.elshaddaicovenantchurch.org

CLICK HERE to listen to this wonderful message by Dr. James Iruobe

UNDERSTANDING THE MARRIAGE COVENANT

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” Genesis 2:24 (NIV)

“And some of the Pharisees came up, and in order to test Him and try to find a weakness in Him asked, Is it lawful for a man to dismiss and repudiate and divorce his wife. He answered them, What did Moses command you? They replied, Moses allowed a man to write a bill of divorce and put her away. But Jesus said to them, Because of the hardness of heart (your condition of insensibility to the call of  God) he wrote you this precept in your law. But from the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave (behind) his father and his mother and be joined to his wife and cleave closely to her permanently. And the two shall become one flesh, so that they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has united (joined together) let not man separate or divide. And indoors the disciples questioned Him again about this subject. And he said to them, Whoever dismisses (repudiates and divorces) his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman dismisses (repudiates and divorces) her husband and marries another, she commits adultery." Mark 10:2- 12. (Amplified)

It was the late Dr. Miles Monroe who said “When purpose is unknown, abuse is inevitable;" this to my mind is really the greatest problem of marriages. In this age of pluralism, things that were hitherto defined in a particular way have now been redefined to mean things that sometimes completely contradicts the original meaning.

The first thing to say about marriage is that many have come to see marriage as a CONTRACT rather than a COVENANT. It is important to make this distinction because this is the very foundation upon which the marriage union is built.
Can I say it loud and clear “Marriage is a COVENANT not a CONTRACT”.

What is a contract?
In very simple layman’s terms, a contract is an agreement between two or more parties stating in clear terms the obligations and responsibilities each parties will discharge in maintaining the agreement. If one party breaches the terms of the agreement, the other party is automatically absolved from any further obligations and responsibilities towards the agreement and such a party is free to exist that relationship. Furthermore in an agreement there is usually a tenure, a specific time frame under which the agreement is in effect after which the parties may or may not continue the relationship.

What is a covenant?
In contrast, a covenant is an agreement between one party (the stronger of the two parties)who proposes the terms of the agreement to another party (the weaker of the two) who accepts of rejects the offer. In the case of a covenant, the one who proposes the terms of the agreement cannot repudiate his obligations or responsibilities irrespective of what the other party does once the offer is accepted. In other words once a covenant is signed and sealed, there is no exit clause. It becomes an agreement for life.

Applying this to marriages, it is usually the man who is the stronger of the two that proposes to a woman and the woman is at liberty to either accept or reject the proposal. However, from God’s perspective once the proposal is made and accepted it becomes a covenant which can never be annulled or repudiated. The introduction of prenuptial contracts, divorce and multiple marriages or what David Pawson calls "Consecutive Polygamy" totally negates God's original design for marriage.

That is why before any man contemplates marriage it is advisable that he must have given serious thought to what he intends to go into because the purpose of marriage is a union for life.
To be continued!

Click here to listen to Understanding the Marriage Covenant by Dr. James Iruobe