FAMILY FINANCES - WHO OWNS WHAT 1

I have heard many women complain that whenever their husbands borrow money from them the husbands never pay back and this has gotten me thinking recently about the dynamics of family finances.

Family finances is an important aspect of the home and if not properly handled can lead to very unpleasant consequences.

Now let me say categorically that I believe strongly that it is the man’s responsibility to cater for his family. By catering it must be understood to mean providing food, shelter, education and security for his family. Everyman worth his salt should pray to be able always to fulfill this obligation without sweat.

Unfortunately, the reality shows that not many men are able for varied reasons to always fulfill this obligation; sometimes because they are temporary out of job or their payments are delayed and at such times have to depend on their wives to augment whatever they can provide.

Now the issue at stake is that many women see such “help” as a loan to the man. Whatever comes from the woman is visualized as being borrowed by the man to solve a problem. There is the case of a man who asked his wife for some money for petrol (gasoline) and she recorded it as a loan to the man.

On the other hand from my experience when a wife asks the husband for money outside the regular upkeep, many men do not consider such monies as loans, so why do women see their assistance in terms of helping the family to stay afloat as a commercial venture?

I have come to understand that the problem is in our culture and the woman’s psyche! Women are brought up to believe that it is the sole responsibility of the man to cater for the welfare of the home. In other words the man’s money is our money (family money) while the woman’s money is hers.

It will do the family a whole lot of good is this perception is changed. Whatever income comes to the family, either from the woman or the man, ought to be treated as family income.

I am not for one moment suggesting that the man should shirk his responsibility but what I am advocating is that the woman must see herself as a partner with the man in catering for the needs of the home. It is a partnership that floats or sinks together according to God’s plan and purpose.

Whatever monies I have “borrowed’ from my wife, in solving family and not personal issues, ought to be written off as “bad debt”.

I rest my case.

God bless you.

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