Without trying to sound like a broken record, it is pertinent to emphasize that becoming friends is a key ingredient in making your relationship with your spouse last. This is essentially what God meant when he said "and the two shall be one".
There are some basic things I can immediately identify as requirement for making the woman blend with her husband especially if they are two people from different backgrounds and cultures. I will try to list them not necessarily in any particular order.
1. Everyman wants his wife to respect him - this is key because a man's ego is the greatest possession he has, not money or fame. Therefore any wife that is able to manage her husband's ego will have little problems.
"And Abigail came to Nabal; and, behold, he held a feast in his house, like the feast of a king; and Nabal's heart [was] merry within him, for he [was] very drunken: wherefore she told him nothing, less or more, until the morning light." 1 Samuel 25:36(KJV) (emphasis mine)
Nabal (whose name meant "Fool") have behaved like his name and incurred the wrath of David who was riding to deal with him with his armed men, but Abigail, the beautiful and wise wife of Nabal did the needful and averted an unnecessary shedding of blood. She saved her husband and her marriage even in the face of her husband's foolish behavior. The interesting thing I want you to note is that after doing this great feat, she choose an auspicious time to talk with her husband. What a woman.
She did not rub it into the face of her husband as some woman are wont to do by saying things like "It serves you right" or "Did I not tell you". These are two statements no man want to hear even when he is wrong or has done something very stupid. Once a man is "stripped" of his ego he is virtually stripped of his manhood and the consequences can be disastrous.
2. The second thing is that everyman needs the advice of his wife but such advice must be timely. There is always a right time to offer advice and a wise woman will always choose the right time and place to offer advice. The bedroom at night when you are alone and you have put your husband in a good mood is such a time. To attempt to "force" your idea on the man will only be rebuffed even if it is a smart idea because it is all about his ego. As a wife try never to talk down to your husband especially in public or before the children.
3. The Third thing is that every man wants his wife to be submissive - The man want to be seen to be in "control" and in the driver's seat. It is must like a pilot and co-pilot on a plane! The co-pilot is allowed to take the control of the aircraft by it is the pilot that is in charge. Many times the passengers do not know exactly who piloted the plane as long as it arrives and lands safely.
Every wise woman knows that behind the scenes she can hold all the aces but allows the man to take the center stage. For example my wife has influenced my decisions more than I have been able to influence hers over the years. This is the truth.
4. The average man want his appetite satisfied when he wants it and not necessarily at the convenience of his wife. Whereas the woman wants to do things at her convenience especially against the background of her hectic day. This has led to many arguments especially in the bedroom when the man want sex. My counsel is that the wife will do well when the man knows that she is bending backwards to please him. Of course this is not to endorse a situation when the man is been unreasonable. Such a wife will have a strong hold on him.
What make good friendship is that both parties are always willing to do things to please the other. Good friends will bend over backwards to do things for their friends and protect them and this is exactly what God intends for all couples.
Make it your goal to become a friend of your spouse - this is an assignment that may take many years but once you achieve this goal it will be happy ending ever after.
God bless you.
Femiimevbore@gmail.com
www.facebook.com/officialecc?ref=hl
www.lifebuilder.ecwid.com
www.elshaddaicovenantchurch.org
No comments:
Post a Comment