Our nature is how we were born. The traits we inherited and the gifts and talents we are naturally endowed with. There are some things we just find ourselves able to do effortlessly while other may have to exert enormous effort to do what we do without sweat.
On the other hand our character is build over time and nurtured by our experiences and the challenges we have had to face and overcome over time.
There are many people I know who have this opinion that they must die the way they were born this is sticking to their nature. They glory in the fact that they are stubborn, unforgiven, vengeful or easily provoked. I used to have a boss who say he can never sleep until he revenges and takes his pound of flesh back on someone who offends him. He never accepts sorry and must retaliate when wronged. Such a view is not only immature but myopic.
Now concerning building lasting relationships, you may enter a relationship especially a marriage with your nature intact but over time you are expected to be nurtured into maturity. Whatever you face in the course of your marital life is God's instructors to nurture you and mold your character.
You can never claim to be patient until you are confronted with a situation that stretches your patience to the limit and your spouse can do just that. You can not claim to be forgiven until your are hurt so deep and betrayed so blatantly by the one you trust.
Our nature helps us to find our place and niche but for us to move forward we must be willing to allow circumstances and situations of life shape us and nurture us into that which God has ordained for us.
Hebrews 5: 8 says "Though he were a son, yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered." Jesus was the son of God, yet he had to be nurtured by the circumstances of life that confronted him throughout his earthly life.
To be fixated in your ways and natural disposition especially if they are not too good is to be tied to the aprons of nature and deny yourself the valuable lessons that life offers all of us to become what God had ordained for us.
Joseph in Genesis 37 was born a privileged and pampered child who was given to bride and flippancy. But at age 30 when he became Prime Minister of Egypt, he had gone through the school of hard knocks and have given up his natural disposition.
To succeed in marriage we must need to shift from what we are natural tendencies are to what becomes expedient for your marriage to work. I have heard some women complain that when their husbands marriage them he knew what they were like but the truth is that every husband marries his wife hoping she will change her bad habits and vice versa.
Be blessed.
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